Live Your Dreams

 

UndercoverWear has several great taglines. Our UndercoverWear NOW program – New Opportunity for Women – rewards women for achievement and encourages every woman to “live your dreams.”

The phrase “live your dreams,” got me thinking. I’ve always set goals. On our honeymoon, when most couples are thinking about SEX, I made a list of all the things I wanted to accomplish in order to live my dreams. (Oh yes, I’m sure that just tickled my new husband. Sex or goal setting – which do you think he would’ve preferred?) My goals ranged from simple things, like having a wine and cheese picnic;  to becoming a millionaire. Yep, you read correctly. At 21 years old, I’d decided I would become a millionaire.

I suppose back then, if I’d said to my friends or family that I wanted to build a multi-million dollar business, have my own jet plane, travel around the world, own 5 homes at the same time and appear on Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous, they would’ve told me I was “nuts.” Those things just don’t happen to two “kids” living in a three-tenement house in Lawrence, Massachusetts.

In fact, my bother-in-law still “jokes” about being asked to invest in UndercoverWear. He said, “No.” He never believed that home lingerie parties could be successful. (By the way, neither did the banks –but that’s an entirely different story.) 

So what made my husband and me believe that we could be successful? Maybe it was because everything was so easy for us. Oh yes, the first 2 years of our marriage, we invested our life savings into a modular home company that couldn’t produce the homes so we lost everything. Oh yes, we then opened our first retail store that burned to the ground. We had no jobs, no money and no insurance! Oh yes, our son had Reyes Syndrome and we were told he wouldn’t live through the night. Hmmm…maybe it wasn’t so “easy” after all.   

So again, what made us believe?! Mohammad Ali said it best, “champions aren’t made in the gym. Champions are made from something they have deep inside them – a desire, a dream, a vision.” 

You must have the desire to achieve. You must have a dream – a fantasy, that only you can make a reality. Finally, you must have the vision to look forward and dream in color.

Helen Keller was once asked, “What could be worse than being blind?” She responded, “Being able to see, but not having a vision.”

Visualize the life that you want and it will be yours. 

Once you have the desire, the dream and the vision, it’s time to create the plan.

If you have a plan without a vision, you are a worker.

If you have a vision without a plan, you are a dreamer.

If you have a vision and a plan, you are an achiever!

These qualities are not independent –they work together as a team!

I firmly believe that life is not a spectator sport.  And if you want to achieve your goals, then you must believe in yourself and believe in your dreams. You should not only want to Live Your Dreams but you should also acknowledge that you deserve to have the life you desire. 

Don’t be daunted by failure.

Everyone has failed at least once in his or her life.

Don’t be daunted by others.

Some will believe in you others will try to drag you down.

As long as YOU believe in YOU, you can write your own Success Story.

I’d really like you to think about how you envision your life.  What are your dreams?  Once you discover what you want --then those dreams become your goals and then those goals become your reality.  You can make YOUR dreams come true.

Top 10 Bad Bedroom Lines

Some people just don’t have an internal edit button. They seem to say whatever comes to their mind – it just rolls off their lips! So for all the internal edit challenged, here are the

Top Ten Things you should Never say while making love…

What SHE should never say

10.       Remind me to call my mother tomorrow.

  9.       Do you think we should paint the (insert object here) walls?

  8.       I don’t know how we’re going to pay the credit card bills.

  7.       Friendship is so much more important than sex.

  6.       Have you noticed that some things seem to get bigger as we age, while others get smaller?

  5.       Sex with you is so comfortable.

  4.       Is your friend (insert Name here) Paul working out lately?  He looks really good!

  3.       Are you in yet?

  2.       It’s OK –I’ll just use my romance toy.

And the number one thing SHE never ever says while making love is…

Do you think Viagra really works?

Now, for what HE should never say

10.       Did you have time to shower today?

  9.       If you love me, you’d try anal sex.

  8.       Do you remember when you were a size 8?

  7.       Do we really have to kiss?

  6.       Baby, just do me.

  5.       Oh come on, I know you love oral sex.

  4.       Is that nightgown supposed to be that tight?

  3.       Why do you need a vibrator when you have me?

  2.       Hey, foreplay really isn’t important.

And the number one thing HE should never ever say while making love is…

So do you think your girlfriend (insert Name here) Lynda – the gorgeous one with the big boobs – would be interested in a threesome?

If you have some of your own to add, I’d love to hear them…I’m sure some of you have heard some real good bad bedroom talk!

Bedroom Quiz

Many of you have taken UndercoverWear’s Sensuality Tests, but today I’m giving you my Romantic Bedroom Quiz. Ready?

(Scoring: Give yourself 10 points for every “yes”)

1.        Does your bedroom have a sweet feminine “Victorian” feel to it?

2.        Do you have lots of pastels and flowers featured in your bedroom?

3.       Do you bring your laptop to bed to catch up on work?

4.       Does your pet ever sleep in your bed?

5.       Do you often discuss important things like your finances, children and “world problems” in bed?

6.       Do you ever hurry to bed before him in order to “pretend” you’re asleep?

7.       Do you chitchat with your girlfriends on the phone when the two of you are in bed?

8.       Is your bedroom your favorite room to watch TV without him?

9.       Is your bedroom cluttered with “stuff?”

10.   Are your sheets the same sheets you’ve had for the past five years?

Bonus Question –worth 25 points

11. Do you have photos of your parents, grandparents and/or kids displayed all over your bedroom?

Now add up your score.  As you’ve probably figured out – points are BAD!!   The more points you accumulated, the LESS romantic your bedroom is!

Let’s review what your bedroom should be. If you’re in a relationship, your bedroom should represent both of you – not just the feminine side of YOU! Plus, your bedroom is probably the place where you experience romance and sex. It certainly destroys the mood when the dog is sleeping next to you or you choose bedtime as the time to chat about those overdue credit cards. Distractions like working on your computer, talking to your girlfriend or watching TV really illustrate your lack of “feeling romantic.” If your bedroom is cluttered, it’s not visually pleasing and while I understand that your sheets can last five years, your relationship may not if you don’t invest in “bedroom creativity.”

Finally, the Bonus question. The last thing you lover wants to see as you are both making mad passionate love is a photo of your parents or the kids staring him in the face. Put the photos elsewhere!!

Remember your bedroom is your haven for romance and sensuality. Create the atmosphere that you can both enjoy!

Humility

Every Saturday evening for the past 30 years, my husband and I have enjoyed Date Night.

When our son, Jamie, was young, we actually enjoyed date night without ever leaving our home! At 7:30pm, Jamie went into his room where he was allowed to watch TV and/or read for an hour and we started Date Night with dinner and champagne in the dining room.  At 8:30pm, we kissed Jamie “goodnight” and headed off to our bedroom. Of course, our night continued with a wardrobe change, an after dinner drink (or two) and lots of PASSION. Jamie knew we were not to be “disturbed,” unless it was something really important. This worked perfectly!

In addition to these home Date Nights, we also had Date Nights where we went out for dinner and dancing. One particular night, we headed to the Ritz in Boston for dancing on the rooftop. I wore a gorgeous, elegant gown, which simply embraced my body – making me look and feel quite glamorous. As it turned out, my make-up and hair came out perfectly and frankly, I looked spectacular. My husband wore his stunning tuxedo. We looked like Richard Gere and Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman.  We were the epitome of style, class and elegance.  As we arrived, heads turned, people stared and we became the center of attention for the entire night.  As we danced till dawn, I knew that we were fabulous. 

The following morning, my husband and I went to 8am mass. As we arrived for mass, Brother Gregory said, “I’m so glad you’re here. After mass, I want to show you the picture of my sister-in-law. She’s the one who looks exactly like you.” Although Brother Gregory was older, I assumed he must have a much younger “real” brother who was married to a young attractive movie star.

After mass, Brother Gregory showed me the photo of his sister-in-law who was somewhere between 70-75 years old. She had blonde curly hair and a lovely smile, but was at least 40 pounds over weight and dressed in a very simple cotton frock. Brother Gregory looked at me and in complete sincerity said, “don’t you two look like twins? You look almost exactly alike.” I looked and saw absolutely no resemblance. He added, “and as I’ve told you before, my sister-in-law is so sweet and wonderful, just like you.” Of course, I remarked, “oh yes Brother Gregory, I can see the resemblance.”

Saturday Night, I was a movie star – gorgeous and quite amazing. Sunday morning, not so much!

This was not only a lesson in humility but also something even greater. The people at the Ritz admired my outer beauty, but Brother Gregory saw the inner beauty. Yes. Beauty is indeed in the eyes of the beholder. I took great comfort and joy that Brother Gregory always said kind and wonderful words about his sister-in-law and about me. It was from that connection, that he determined how we looked like twins. Brother Gregory’s compliment was far more valuable to me than any other from that weekend. As Judge Judy says, “beauty fades. Brains are forever.” 

And as I’ve matured in life, I feel blessed that while the boobs may sag a little more and the fine lines increase, as long as I remember that beauty comes from within, I will still be that gorgeous Pretty Woman to myself and others.

Forgive Them, or Outlive Them.

Every so often I come across something I like.  Of course I have edited this a bit, and would love to share it with you.  I truly hope that I can live up to these words of encouragement.

Toward the end of Sunday service, the Priest asked, “How many of you have forgiven your enemies?”

80% held up their hands.  He then did a sermon on forgiveness and the Priest then repeated his question.
This time all held up their hands, except one small elderly lady.

The Priest was bewildered.

He asked, “Mrs. James ,  Are you not willing to forgive your enemies?”

”Oh Father, I don't have any enemies.” She replied, smiling sweetly. 

The Priest was both astonished and impressed.  “Mrs. James, that is very unusual. May I ask, how old are you?”

“Ninety-eight.” She replied.

“Oh, Mrs.  James, how remarkable.  You must be a very special woman.  Can you please come down in front and tell us all how a person can live ninety-eight years, and not have a single enemy in the world?”

The little sweetheart of a lady tottered down the aisle (still wearing her stiletto heels), faced the congregation, and said, “Thankfully, I outlived all those bitches.” 

I actually sent this story to my Aunt Cora.  She is eighty-four years young, and believe me, in her prime she was a sassy, saucy women. 

In fact I have had three female role models in my life.  They are…

My  Mother -- who taught me how to stay positive and laugh often.  She also gave me an incredible sense of fairness.  She insisted that my sisters and I achieve success through our brains – thankfully, not through our “good looks” --because I would have come up quite short. But most importantly as a female role model, she gave me a tremendous work ethic.

My Aunt Helen (who also worked at UCW) gave me a sense of freedom.  Growing up, she taught me how to dance around the house and make the most out of life.  She convinced me that I could do fun and spontaneous things without feeling embarrassed or introspective.

To this day, I have been known to dance around a hotel lobby if there is a band playing.  My grand daughter, Niccie, and I did just that two nights ago. 

And finally, my Aunt Cora.  She taught me that one could achieve in business, as she did, and still be the consummate hostess.  I learned how to set the table properly, which fork to use, and how to entertain guest. 

Boy, I must say, I was pretty lucky to have such strong, accomplished wonderful women in my life. 

So the moral to my story is, hopefully if I’ve had any enemies, I have forgiven them, and if I haven’t thus far, I hope I outlive them.