Quest for Holiday Perfection!

Last week, WJJ and I went to a wonderful champagne tasting event with a few of our favorite friends.  It was really wonderful.  There were several bottles of exquisite champagne.  We all savored every drop.  One of my favorite “dinner partners”, Mark, commented that despite all the Holiday activities, I seemed so relaxed.  I said I had just said the same thing to WJJ.  And I assumed it was because we are not going on a cruise in January.  Usually aside from all the hustle and bustle of Christmas, I’m packing MANY boxes to be shipped for our glamorous and long voyage.

I said, “You know Mark, I feel so amazing calm --it’s unbelievable.”  Obviously, it was the champagne talking.  Because that night, I woke up at 2:30 AM and went to the bathroom every 15 minutes.  No I didn’t have a UTI, I had HLA  --Holiday List Anxiety!  Oh the reason, I kept going to my bathroom is because that’s where I keep my “middle of the night idea” notebook.

What was I thinking?  Sure, I had finished most of my Christmas shopping but I have a zillion things to do.  And they all have a deadline.   So following my own advice I did readjust my Top Priorities and took several deep breathes.  I also eliminated a few things -that just weren’t going to get done.

You know someone once told me that I should write a book entitled, “How to run your life like a Business.”  Because evidently that’s what I do.  Frankly it seems to work.   But staying balance while reaching your goals and keeping your sanity, doesn’t just happen.  You have to truly discipline yourself to stay focused.

We also have to abandon our “super woman syndrome.”  Remember the old adage, we can make some of the people happy all of the time or all the people happy some of the times but we can’t make all the people happy all of the times.  All too often we strive for perfection in every aspect of our lives.  And that’s impossible. So we feel like a failure.  And that doesn’t feel good at all.

We lose sight of what is import and what isn’t.  For example, if we are making a Gingerbread House with our children is it really that important how it turns out? Or is the importance the time we spend together as a family?  I learned that lesson many years ago.  For 3 consecutive years, Jamie and I made Gingerbread Houses.  Each year, the result was more beautiful. 

Evidently, the next year, I was rushed and somehow I “messed up” the frosting.  As I tried to attach the cookies -the damn things wouldn’t “stick”. Time after time I tried.  I added more confectionary sugar --still no luck.  Of course Jamie was long gone knowing that I was crossing the threshold of Holiday Insanity, so he went to watch TV with WJJ!  Thank the Lord, it hit me like a ton of bricks --who cares.  I brought Jamie back with Elmer’s Glue in hand.  Laughing hysterically, we glued all the cookies onto the Gingerbread House.  It was one of our best experiences.  Of course we did put a sign “Do Not Eat.”  Truth be known, we almost allowed one of my “not so nice” aunts to actually eat a cookies drenched in glue, but at the last moment my sense of Christmas goodness emerged! 

So stay focused on why Christmas is Christmas.  It’s all about goodness and giving and the spirit of joy. Trust me ladies, we’ll get through this together.

BTW,  several of you have already guessed from a previous blog, I am the Crazy Chick trying to lose 5 pounds before Christmas --but I’m not alone --am I?

Holiday Shopping Tips!

OK  I promised you some simple suggestion to help you keep your sanity in the next three weeks.  Oh perhaps reminding you that Christmas is 21 days away, wasn’t particularly calming.  Oh well sorry, but that is the reality.

During my last blog, I suggested that you better get organized.  Hopefully, you took my advice.  If you did not, then I’m going to have to say it again.  For the busy woman who has lots to accomplish, getting organized is a MUST!

I’m going to guess that Christmas Shopping is on your list.  When it comes to buying gifts, there are 3 essential components: 

1.  Decide how much you want to spend

2. Decide what you want to buy 

3. Determine how much time it will take to find or create the right item.  

In other words: Thought, Time and Money.

So let me explain that further.

Thought --Really thinking about what the person wants.  Sometimes, it has nothing to do with how much money you want to spend.  One year Nancy, our VP of sales  gave me 25 different  and unique cards that I could send out throughout the year.  I loved it!  In turn, the following year, I bought my Mother a plethora of all occasion  cards  so she would have them at her fingertips.  She, too, loved that gift!

Nancy also sends me her date-nut bread every year.  I LOVE it!  (Hopefully Nancy is reading my blog and will get my subtle hint!)

It really makes me laugh when someone says, “What can you buy someone who has everything.”  That’s ridiculous.    I can name 100 things that I love receiving.  And the price ranges start at $3.00.   I’ll bet your saying, “no way.”  Way!  Shall I prove it?

Example:  As most of you know, I love sending notes.  I have to use “the right pen.”

One that I like is a Pilot .  Cost --less than $3.00

So you really have to think about “what would this person really appreciate?” 

Time--As mentioned, some of the best gifts are things that cannot be purchased. 

Before UndercoverWear, I gave WJJ a “Fantasy Fishbowl” for Christmas.  I put 52 different “fantasies” --some sensual --others not.  I won’t go into the Sensual ones, but the others were things like, “I’ll say I’m sorry --even if I’m not.”  And, “ I’ll watch a John Wayne movie with you without complaining.”  Anyway, that was one of his best gifts. 

When we were first married because we could not afford to spend money, I decided to make all the Christmas gifts.  In fact I, who cannot sew a stitch, bought a sewing machine and made WJJ a velvet smoking jacket. Of course no one told me that with velvet you have to “watch the knap”, so one sleeve had the velvet going the wrong way. However, believe it or not,  he still has that jacket.  If you’re saying, “But you bought a sewing machine,” let me tell you I also made the curtains, made the throw pillow, and even made Jamie’s little Easter Outfit-- a brown one piece “little boy” jumpsuit with a white jacket.  I have the photos to prove it.  Maybe on Jamie’s 40^th birthday I’ll do a special blog where I show all these embarrassing pictures of him!

 So, think about those on your list.  If you’re “buying” for a Mother of 3 young ones, I’m gonna guess volunteering to babysit for an afternoon would be worth a zillion $$$ to her.   When you’re giving “gifts from the heart”, often it takes time.  And we all know that time is a precious commodity.  So you are giving the most valuable gift of all.

Money--This is easy.  Money can buy great gifts.  However, when those credit cards come in --not quite so pleasant.  Always decide exactly what your budget is.  And don’t overspend!  Stick to the budget.  Although, I always disliked giving gift cards, it seems everybody loves them.  So if your budget is $25.00 then give a $25.00 gift card.  And as you probably know, at many places you can set your own dollar amount -even $5.00 (like Starbucks).  As an FYI, when you’re purchasing a Visa or Amex gift card, you do have to pay 3%. Extra.  So you might want to consider simply giving a check. 

If you have a higher budget for a special friend or relative, still get creative.  Several years ago,   I gave Jamie and Cheryl, my sisters and a couple of close friends  six different wines. The prices ranged from $10.00 up to $50.00 a bottle.  I made a list of each wine with the price.  Then , I removed all labels and simply marked the bottles numbered 1 - 6.  The recipients had to drink the wine and then tell me which wine they thought they were drinking.  My sisters and friends loved the “game”, Jamie said, “Only my mother would take the fun out of drinking.”  Oh well.  I still love idea.

Another great gift idea -which is easy --Omaha Steaks. They have GREAT deals. Look in your Sunday paper and/or online at www.omahasteaks.com.  The Omaha Reserved Steaks are incredible!

If you’re thinking about creating “gift baskets” --especially UndercoverWear spa baskets --that’s a great idea.  But when assessing your budget, if you’re shipping the item --add that cost to your budget.  Here in Hawaii, shipping is very costly.

Another gift idea that most people love is “monogrammed anything”.  I often do “bath baskets” with UCW items and monogrammed towels + of course our “It’s a Wrap”.  Instead of ordering the towel monogrammed which can be expensive, we’ve found a fellow who does monogramming quickly and quite reasonably.

So let’s recap: 

Get Organized

Make Your Christmas Shopping List 

Go through each person think about what THEY would truly appreciate.

Decided what you can afford to spend and then get creative!

Make this Christmas Shopping a fun experience not a chore!

Take that Stress off your Plate

As we get closer and closer to Christmas, I’m hearing , “Oh my gosh, I’m so stressed.

I have way too much on my plate!”  OK ladies think about that.  Life is like a buffet line.  If there’s too much on your plate, you put it there.

I have the feeling you are now screaming at me.  “What?  Are you nuts?” That’s my life.  I have a lot to do.  I have a shocker for you.  Everybody has lot to do. --Well at least every woman I know has a lot to do.  I can’t make this sexist, but I recently called my sisters after experiencing a very hectic day (while WJJ was golfing) and said, “Next time, I’m coming back as a Gay Guy”.  I can still be feminine when I want to, have a gorgeous hunky boyfriend and not do all this “wife-mother-social director-chef-business woman” stuff

Anyway, let’s get back to what’s on your plate during the Holiday Season.  Over the last week here are some examples of what’ I’ve heard.

Mary:  I really need to wallpaper the guest room, Dave’s parents are coming for the Holidays.

Holly: Billy’s school is having a bake sale, so I have to spend the day making Christmas cupcakes.

Terri: I haven’t really eaten in 3 days because I’m trying to loose 5 pounds before Christmas.

Nora: I bought some hair color stuff at CVS, because I don’t have time to go to the hairdresser and get my roots done.

Shelly: I’m going to make all the food myself for our Christmas Party --I want it to be really special.

Carol: I have absolutely no time to even think about my “Christmas letter and cards” but I have to send them. People are so eager to read what’s happened to me this year -and it’s not pleasant.

Sally: I want to start an exercise program before the holidays.

All these Ladies are officially welcome to my “Crazy Club”.  Are they  crazy?

Mary:  You’ve been married to Dave for 15 years.  You never got along with Dave’s Mother.  New wallpaper isn’t going to change that.  Take it off your plate

Holly:  Buy plain cupcakes (cheaper) buy some small Christmas decoration or red “sprinkles” take 5 minutes to make them look like Christmas,  put them on one of your fancy dishes and swear you made them.  Take it off your plate.

Terri: Good plan --not eating, and drinking only coffee and diet coke. That will calm you down.  Not enough stress going --add that.  My advice--go eat a donut (not chocolate) and take it off your plate.

Nora:  So when you screw up your hair and have to spend hours having it fixed - or worse, look horrid for the holiday, how are you going to feel?  You know what?  I think you can fit in a couple of hours for YOU!  Book that hair appointment now and Take it off your plate.

Shelly:  Go to Costco or BJ’s and go food shopping.  Then stop at the “beverage department” and get some good wine.   The food will be great and after a couple of glasses of wine, it will taste even better.  Trust me, everyone will love your party.  Take it off your Plate

Carol:  If you haven’t even started thinking about Christmas cards --don’t !  Instead wait and send everyone a New Year’s card .  And while I understand that you have experienced  an incredibly miserable year --those of us close to you have been feeling and listening to  your pain for 52 weeks.  Yes, we can give you every detail about your now ex-husband and his big boob blond girlfriend who is 23 years younger than him or you.  Trust me we don’t need to read about it.  And do you really want to share all your “bad news” to others over the holiday season?  Nope, it will only depress you more.  So send a cheery Happy New Year’s Card the week AFTER Christmas so you can Take it Off your Plate.

Sally:  If you haven’t exercised in the last 49 weeks, do you think that perhaps you might want to wait until after the New Year?  Put it on your 2011 Goal Sheet and for now - Take It Off Your Plate.

Ok now that I am lecturing everyone, truth be known, the names I have given you are false --to protect “the guilty.”  And ladies, I am President of the “Are you Crazy Club” because I am one of these ladies.  Not telling you which one --but I bet you can guess?

So for the first time ever, I don’t want to invite you to join my club.  Instead, take a deep breath and decide what you can “Take Off Your Plate.”

Holiday Stress Test!

On a yearly basis, we as woman undergo a series of tests.  We test our eyesight, our hearing and we even have the dreaded mammogram and Pap smear.  All of these tests are designed to determine if we are A - OK.

But do you know that each and every year, we  undergo a crucial test to measure our mental stability?  I’ll bet you’re thinking, “I don’t remember taking a mental stability test.”  Ok think again.

This test takes place each and every year starting the week before Thanksgiving and ending the week after New Year’s Eve.  It’s called the Holiday Insanity Test.  This is the ultimate test to see if we are capable of maintaining our sanity against all odds.

The Holiday Season is supposed to be filled with joy and happiness.  But we all know, it can be incredibly busy, emotional and stressful.   But we’re supposed to be singing “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year”?  Boy the dichotomy is obvious.

We started saying things like, “I’m tired, I’m irritable and have so much to do.”  As the days progress it’s “I’m not going to get everything done before Christmas.”  Then we start getting personal.  “My husband does nothing, the kids want everything and my boss is a pain where I sit.”  You know you’re ready to crack when you finally say,  “I hate the Holiday Season.”

Do you really want to be Halloween Hilda’s Wicked Whiny Witch or Scrooges Ba Hum Bug Bitch? No no, nay nay.

You really can turn this Season of Stress into Holiday Happiness.   The solution is simple.  Try the 3 V diet.  Vitamins, vodka and valium.   OK I’m really just joking.  Can’t mix vodka and valium – so take your choice. 

In all seriousness, if you want the Holiday season to be easy then all you have to do is GO  GO  GO!!  No, I don’t mean start running around shopping, I mean GO --GET Organized.  No, I can already hear you saying, “I don’t have time to get organized.”

Trust me you can’t afford NOT to get organized.  Remember in every situation, success is 90% preparation and 10% execution.  In the next few days I’ll start giving  you some  EZ organizational tips to allow you to enjoy the Holiday Season.

So get your paper and pencils or computers ready and put aside a couple of hours to begin the process.  Yes, you actually have to allocate that time to get organized--that is your first step!  And start your thinking process with the following:

What are the most important things I want and/or need to do for this Holiday Season?  Your list can include things like:

Christmas Shopping

Christmas Cards

Christmas Party

Home Improvement for the Holidays

Decorate House

Christmas Eve

Christmas Day

Fluff and Buff

Family Fun

New Year’s Eve

New Year’s Day

Romance Time (Don’t laugh)

Personal Fun (Don’t laugh again)

Botox

Charity Work

Church

Baking

Once the list is completed, congratulate yourself --you now have your Holiday Sanity Goal Sheet!  And we’re off!!!!